Watching some of the local 11:00 news last night, I was positively riveted by their top story. Apparently, something is going on somewhere! Luckily WHAS was the first to tell us about it, and it's a good thing I caught the 11:00 broadcast, since I had missed the story at 5:30, 6:00, and 10:00.
To be fair, the story does have the potential to be interesting. A federal investigation is going on at the University of Louisville. Unfortunately, any of the details that would actually make the story interesting, such as who is being investigated and why, are still under wraps. It's not WHAS's fault, of course, that no one will tell them anything, but when all the info they have would fit on a single notecard, does it really warrant being the top story on multiple broadcasts throughout the evening? I mean, you can't really stretch a teaser out into a substantial story, no matter how hard you try or what sort of enlightening comments you get from U of L students.
Yeah, we get it: you guys were first. Don't worry, Gary. When there's an actual story to report, we'll give you the credit for telling us about it seconds before one of the other local stations. Until then, maybe you can tell us about something that actually has some substance. That is, if we can make it out through your bludgeoning of sentences, your stammers like so many lead pipes against the words stumbling drunkenly from your lips.